Every now and then Hannes kindly suggests me to get a girlfriend. Of course he doesn't mean that I should turn to a lesbian but he thinks I should hang out with girls too. In a way I agree with him. I have started to feel way too comfortable with boys. They just make better friends. But that's not the only reason why the vast majority of my friends are boys.
The real reason is that other girls at my age make me feel insecure. And I really don't like to feel that way. I've never felt as insecure with boys than I have with girls. I know that boys get me. They understand what I'm talking about since most of the time I'm talking their language anyway.
And other girls make me feel ugly which of course make me even more insecure. But I can't help it. I'm like totally clueless when it comes to clothes and make-up and hair and other girl shit. I just don't know how to do it properly. And it doesn't help that I happen to have like bad hair day every single day and a problem skin. So it's like no matter how hard I try I always feel myself somehow less pretty.
And then there is this one thing that I lead a very different life than other girls usually do. It's not exactly easy to be a girl nerd. I know other girl nerds exist but I've chosen to believe it only when I actually meet one. And so far I have met none. I simply can't imagine myself befriending with someone who doesn't understand nerdism. And I'm not sure if I ever even want to. And once again my strict teetotalism is not helping. I wouldn't want to hang out with girls who are into partying and stuff. I want to stay home drinking tea and watching silly movies and not hear a shit about how my life's lame.
And let's face it: girls are back-stabbing bitches. That's what I meant earlier when I said that boys make better friends. They don't talk dirty things about you behind your back or... anything that girls tend to do to each other. They're just above all that shit. And I rather stay out of it too. Don't get me wrong here. I'm totally bitchy too, but not to boys since they're not bitchy to me.
I know that my view of girls is totally stereotypical. And I do know that there are plenty of girls out there who are actually really nice. Like Elina for example! They're just not coming to me and I always rather befriend with boys if possible. Btw, if you're nice and you think you wouldn't intimidate me, feel free to drop me a comment or something.
The real reason is that other girls at my age make me feel insecure. And I really don't like to feel that way. I've never felt as insecure with boys than I have with girls. I know that boys get me. They understand what I'm talking about since most of the time I'm talking their language anyway.
And other girls make me feel ugly which of course make me even more insecure. But I can't help it. I'm like totally clueless when it comes to clothes and make-up and hair and other girl shit. I just don't know how to do it properly. And it doesn't help that I happen to have like bad hair day every single day and a problem skin. So it's like no matter how hard I try I always feel myself somehow less pretty.
And then there is this one thing that I lead a very different life than other girls usually do. It's not exactly easy to be a girl nerd. I know other girl nerds exist but I've chosen to believe it only when I actually meet one. And so far I have met none. I simply can't imagine myself befriending with someone who doesn't understand nerdism. And I'm not sure if I ever even want to. And once again my strict teetotalism is not helping. I wouldn't want to hang out with girls who are into partying and stuff. I want to stay home drinking tea and watching silly movies and not hear a shit about how my life's lame.
And let's face it: girls are back-stabbing bitches. That's what I meant earlier when I said that boys make better friends. They don't talk dirty things about you behind your back or... anything that girls tend to do to each other. They're just above all that shit. And I rather stay out of it too. Don't get me wrong here. I'm totally bitchy too, but not to boys since they're not bitchy to me.
I know that my view of girls is totally stereotypical. And I do know that there are plenty of girls out there who are actually really nice. Like Elina for example! They're just not coming to me and I always rather befriend with boys if possible. Btw, if you're nice and you think you wouldn't intimidate me, feel free to drop me a comment or something.
I can understand your point of view quite well. Being a guy, I've always had an easier time being friends with girls. I'm into nerdy techy stuff when it comes to computers, but I don't really know much about cars, and I know absolutely nothing about sports. Worse yet, I don't care for the taste of beer.
ReplyDeleteIt's not that guys don't make good friends - I've had a few, but you can count the total sum of them with one hand and still end up with extra fingers. But I rely on friends to fulfill certain means of emotional support, and most men I know fail miserably in this department.
Not that befriending girls doesn't come with its own problems; many of them sometimes seem irrational to me, or rather, girls tend to make simple things overly complicated.
I don't think guys are "above" all the backstabbing bitchiness. I think we just function differently. We're simple creatures, and I can't blame you for wanting to surround yourself with friends who will not add into the drama in your life.
As for the girly stuff...why would it be necessary for you to be very adapt at the girl stuff, the makeup and whatever. If it's not important to you, then it simply does not matter all that much how proficient you are at that stuff. In other words, don't try to be something you're not, just so you might have an easier time making friends with the same sex. It never really works out in long-term.
I used to have it quite the same way, but then over the years it has changed now. I guess what triggered it was when I went to work in a place where very naturally girls hung out much more with girls, boys with boys, etc. So I kind of adjusted to it and discovered that hanging out with girls only gang can be fun after all. Hell, I've started to care about perfume and make-up now and watch American Next Top Model daily :D
ReplyDeleteI guess I've learned how to do girls by now - and girls got their plusses too, you know :)
Gosh I hate when I receive better comments than my blog posts :D
ReplyDeleteChin up, Amoena!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you're just as pretty as everyone else - ALL the girls feel less pretty than the others sometimes! See, you've got more in common with most girls than you'd like to admit! ;)
Also you'll miss out a lot of fun with the girls. Guys make great friends but so do girls. It's all about finding the right balance and the right people. Good luck!