Monday, June 01, 2009

Imagination is the highest kite that one can fly

I got another award. It's an Imagination Award and I got it from Alexandra. She probably gave it to me so I would have to blog. I know. I've been lazy and neglecting my duty to blog at least once a week. But I'm so exhausted... or not really. Mentally exhausted, maybe. Nothing happens to me anymore. I'm a stay-at-home mom, though I don't have kids. I just have one energetic puppy to keep me busy.

Papu's been lovely. I've taught her to sit and to go down. Now I'm teaching her to give her paw, though I'm not sure if that's necessary. I should probably focus on something more important, like how to pass other dogs and humans without making a fuss. Though she's perfectly capable of making a fuss all by herself. She's like a master of fuss making.

My transfer application to Tampere was accepted. That doesn't mean anything yet. J.R. is having his entrance exam tomorrow. That doesn't mean anything either. It's just a chance we could take if we feel like it. It's not like we really need to move anywhere. Our home is already here. I just feel good that my application got accepted. It means that I'm not a complete loser. They want me!

I wish I had more friends. I'm lonely. And when I'm lonely, I get depressed. And if I'm depressed, the rest will suck too. I'm used to not having friends around, but it's harder when there is no school or work where you could meet other people. Being alone makes me numb. I know that there are plenty of things I could do alone (though I can't leave Papu alone for a long time), but somehow I manage to do nothing all day. I can't watch TV, I can't read books, I can't write, I can't do anything. Because everything would remind me how lonely I am. I don't really want to watch TV alone, I don't want to read books alone... They're just a poor substitute for a social life I've never had. Whine, whine, whine.

Anyway. I feel really honored by the Imagination Award. It feels so good when my blog gets noticed. After all, this is probably all I've ever accomplished. I'll make another post for the award. Tomorrow, or later. I have to figure out whom I want to give the award.


  1. You deserve the award!!! I'm so happy to give it to you!!! I love reading your blog! Of course it is also nice to read a blog post from you ;)

    Congratulations on getting accepted! That's wonderful!!!

    I understand how you feel, I also feel that way sometimes... I really hope you feel better soon :)

  2. Kuulostaa niin tutulta. Mä en saa unta kun mietin vaan etten jaksa elää siihen asti että jotenkin ihmeellisellä tavalla onnistuisin hankkimaan kavereita. Hohhoijaa.

  3. Why wouldn't they have wanted you! You're amazing! Duh. I'm happy to hear the award and the acceptance helped to cheer you up. Talk to you soon!