New Year's Eve

It's like New Year's Eve and stuff. I got like a lot in my mind right now. And it bothers me like hell when Aleksi is keeping me away from blogging when I really really really would like to blog. Like earlier he wanted to watch a movie even though I said I like need to blog in case I feel tired later and feel like not to. Blah.

Today we ate @ Chico's. It's not like the greatest restaurant in the world but it's cheap. And they have a lot of chicken in their menu. I don't really eat red meat unless it's like minced. And later I went shopping by myself. Which reminded me when Aleksi said that I should have a girlfriend too, in case I would like to go shopping or something. I was like "who are you talking about". Anyway. I bought some cut-price underwear, though I didn't really have like selection. I only wear black bras. Not because I like to wear black in general, which by the way is also true, but because if they were like pink or any other light color I would wash them with my regular dark clothes anyway and they would turn to an ugly shade of grey instead of nice pink. So that's why I go for black, because black stays black. And the other reason for the lack of selection is that I got like a very standard bosom so there were no my size left.

I have tried to go for new bands lately and it's not like easy. I tried some of my sister's favorites. Since she quite obviously loved Mors Principium Est I thought I could like whatever she's listening to too. First I tried out Cradle Of Filth. It sounded quite OK until the singing began. Sorry, but no, I don't have a Donald Duck fixation. I don't know if you're even supposed to listen to it seriously. Then I tried out Soilwork but it was a disappointment too. It was like filled too much with angst and sounded quite much like Disturbed and I don't really like that either. I have never thought myself as picky listener but I guess I am what comes to the genres I like most.

I think I should list the highlights of 2007 now when it's ending. OK, here they come: I quit school. I got my first job. I made new terrific friends. I saw Evanescence live. I learned more about CSS and web usability and stuff. I started a new blog (and got rid of it later). I switched to Ubuntu... Pretty boring, ha? Anyway. Let's see what the new year brings to me. Hopefully more of this and a lot more.

Tiididii

Yesterday night I started to blog. But suddenly I started to feel very tired and I decided to close my eyes for a moment. And then I napped for like two hours and finally I gave up on blogging and went to bed.

Yesterday I also tried to listen to some music at work. Two people asked what I was listening. I think it is a really personal question. There are music that you're supposed to like smoke. Something light that you can play on the background. And then there are music that you have to shoot in to your veins to get the real kick out of it. And my drug use is something I rather keep myself. Anyway. I still like to talk about music in general, especially when someone who knows my taste recommends new bands to me. I just don't want to show my inner n00b when it comes to music. I hardly know any cool bands and I guess I mostly listen to some mainstream shit.

Yesterday I also hang out with a friend. And I managed to serve better tea than last time... though I only boiled the water.

I feel like totally dragged down by life. But it's going to be a new year, new places, new faces and new stuff. I hope that cheers me up since I really hate to be this way.

Updated and upgraded

Now it's just me. All my favorite boys are gone. In a way it's like an itch you can't scratch. I know it doesn't sound like a nice metaphor but it's like an amputated leg. It's missing but you can still feel it itching. Anyway. It's not as bad as it could be since M. is still there. Though soon M. is quitting too. Is this like some official quitting month and someone forgot to tell me?

I have upgraded my hair. My mother dyed it a bit blonder and cut it a bit shorter. And it was like a miracle: suddenly I looked like a girl again. It was only like five centimeters off and the same hair color I have used so many times. So how can it make such a big change? Or am I only imagining?

What I got this year

Now we have ate and all the presents have been opened. This was indeed a very good year for me:

- Four books, two by my favorite author Paulo Coelho, some random titled "The Meaning of Life" and "Suuri Poptoivelaulukirja 3".
- Two shirts, pajama, some socks and slippers
- Gift token to the Body Shop
- Some sauna accessory
- Projector clock
- Free tickets to Finnkino
- Towel and other bath accessories
- Hammer
- Two whiskers
- Citrus juicer
- Money
- USB finger dance mat
- In-ear headphones
- Nice selection of tea bags and a jar to store loose tea
- Bookmark
- Taika mug by Iittala

There is a chance I missed something. But I'm sure I mentioned everything important.

What I got last year.

The book

This is awesome. I remembered that I brought a book!!! And I started to read it and now I'm feeling a lot less bored!!! The book (Everyone Worth Knowing by Lauren Weisberger) seems to be complete nonsense but hey, it has 515 pages. And we are probably going to eat within an hour. Whoa.

OMG. My aunt sneaked behind me and nearly gave an heart attack. Thank you very much.

Not much progress

I just put the presents under the Christmas tree. I also took the traditional "stupid dog in a basket" picture by my camera phone. It's a must. And later I watched my mother who was making me my salad. I know that you're not supposed to eat only salad on a Christmas feast but if there was not a salad especially for me I wouldn't eat anything. I'm a bit picky, yes.

Still bored

I just finished watching Big and though I have seen it earlier it was still quite enjoyable. I have also been eating rice porridge and fool that was made of dried fruits. And of course more peanuts & raisins. There are less and less to do but more and more to eat. It should be other way round. Is Christmas really meant to be this boring?

The tree is done

I woke up like 10am. It was dark and so silent that I decided to sleep more. And then I woke up 11am and it was still very dark and silent. But I stood up anyway. I ate some raisins for a breakfast because I couldn't find anything else to eat. And then I rushed to shower. When I got from shower my mom, uncle and aunt came home and my mom asked if I liked to wear a bright red fleece outfit. And now I'm looking like a bloody elf. Hooray.

And then I decorated the Christmas tree. My mom watched and gave me the decorations and I placed them gently wherever I found an empty branch. There was really no logic and we don't even have much decorations so the whole decorating was done really quickly. But it does look good and it will look even better when all the Christmas presents are under it.

Peanuts & raisins

OK. So far I have eaten peanuts and raisins like crazy. I already feel like super bloated and sick. I was bit on a heavy side earlier too and now I've definitely gone beyond all my limits. But I fast after Christmas. Right now I'm too busy thinking chocolate. There just got to be chocolate tomorrow or I don't survive this boredom. Mmm...

It's a shame I don't have a digital camera with me. There are few things I would like to capture: One is our recently reformed hall. There used to be ugly yellowish wallpapers but they ripped them off and revealed a really beautiful wooden wall. And then there used to be a red retro looking rack but now it's painted with a nice light green colour. Not to mention the new shelf and cool stuff on it. It's really awesome. And the other thing is our Christmas tree, of course, and probably me decorating it.

Jeans

I'm at Viiala now. And I'm already bored since sister stole my mp3-player. Last thing I heard she was whining something how I listen to satanic music. And then she kept listening to it.

I found a pair of old jeans from my closet today. I remember that I stopped using them because they were broken. Compared to what I have been wearing lately they were like brand new. Only two tiny holes in places where you barely see them. And the other pair is practically falling apart. So it was indeed a good find.

Now that I have been wearing these jeans I remember how I once use to look like a real girl. When I got it all right. When I still wore colours and big earrings and when I use to play with my hair and make-up and stuff. I still got it but I'm just too lazy to make the effort. I prefer low maintenance. But I guess I could dress up once in a while. You know. Just to prove that I can.

Quickie

All the Christmas presents are now bought and nicely wrapped. I made it on time again. Hooray! Tomorrow I'm going to Viiala where I will also spend my whole holiday. I'm not so excited about it. At least they have broadband nowadays so I can keep on blogging.

I have been quite busy today. I woke up quite late, though I would have slept even later if I hadn't had so much to do. I went to Sello for some last minute Christmas shopping, which according to last paragraph was a successful trip. After that we went to Marhaba to get some quality pizzas to eat. And even later I met Hannes so he could give me a Christmas present. Am I like really popular this Christmas? Anyway. We hang out only for a moment because I had to go to the movies with Aleksi. And when I got home it was already so late that I had to leave right away. But the movie was great and I try to review it later.

But didn't I do so?

It was quite a weird day at work. There was nothing to do and we were mostly hanging out. But it's crazy when there is like only few things to do and you simply try to skip them too. I never thought I was that lazy. Anyway. It was like an end of an episode. When I started there was already J.R. and S. Now I'm the only one left and there are plenty of newbies I have to teach. Time goes by so fast and things turn upside down. I understand that things have to change. I just hate how those changes have to happen before I'm ready.

I have now bought and wrapped nearly all the Christmas presents. I still have to figure out what to give to my mother. She's the most difficult one though she said that she wants some foot creme from the Body Shop. Unfortunately when she said that she was clearly not aware that there are only two types of foot cremes on TBS and the first one smells absolutely awful and the second one is something that will cool your feet. And who wants cold feet when it's already cold? I tried to look for other foot cremes but I couldn't find anything suitable. I still have one day to search.

I have also made two IE voodoo dolls and I'm going to make a third one too for myself. The tutorial is really good but I just got to modified the dolls a bit. I wrote "DIE" on my voodoo dolls so you can remove the needles and still keep the message clear. I just thought that the dead face was not enough. They could be used as alternative Christmas tree decorations for nerds. Anyway. It was really nice to sew felt and I think I should do it more often. Wonder what else you could do.

I don't know how this post turned out this way. I have been writing this ever since I got home from work. I have been writing and rewriting and deleting and editing and everything like crazy. I hate these days when you have a lot to blog but you just run out of words. My original plan was to write about New Year's revelations and about my feelings towards Christmas and all these things ending. And if this really was about those I would probably have added to the end how J.R. brought me a Christmas present and how I without realizing it made him wait in the cold far too long.

I need a summer but it's winter in my heart

I have started to sleep less and less. This is like the fourth night in a row when I am still up after midnight. But I feel sleeping useless. I'm still tired when I wake up and I'm always in a coma at work anyway. So why not to do something more important with these few hours. Blogging is a good choice, as well as listening to music. And currently I'm doing both.

It's nearly Christmas and there is no snow. But it's not like I miss it. Green grass is fine too. Looks like an autumn to me and I love autumn. Anyway. There is a song called "Winter In My Heart" by VAST. It took a quite long time for me to start to dig it and now I'm totally into it. I listen to it at the mornings when I'm on my way to work and when it gets mixed with a gentle cold breeze and the street lamps it's like a real life music video. That's one of the many reasons why I love my mp3-player. Music makes everything a bit more breathtaking, you just have to look right.

I'm ready

Yesterday night I tried to play my favourite game with J.J. It's called "Who's the most pathetic nolife" and I'm usually really good at it. But this time I didn't won. I guess it wasn't even close. It made me realize that my life has changed and how it's still changing.

I feel grateful but I don't know who to thank. It's just all this together and it's amazing. I'm aware that this can be just one good episode of my life before some dreadful plot twist but I'm hopeful. Maybe this is what I have been waiting for when it's grown stronger and older. Or maybe, more likely, this is just another disappointment.

I have been much more into music lately. I feel like a teenager, like every song is about my life. And I love how music penetrates my brain and just makes me oh so happy and numb in a good way. Can you overdose music? Since I feel it running through my veins and it's making me high.

Ja mitä sitten tapahtui

First day at work without O. It was a good example what happens if you take things for granted. Since we were there long before O. I expected that in a way we could have managed to fill the gap he left behind. But it was obvious that he was missing. It was actually quite sad to go to the first break. Before we used to gather up and then go together but today there was not much gathering to do. Just me and J.R. And when we did the daily crossword puzzle it simply wasn't the same anymore. And on the next break I had to sit alone while J.R. was warming his food. It felt like a really long time. And at the end of the day when there was nothing to do there was also no one to hang out with.

But his spirit was still present. After fixing the strapping machine M. said that O. taught him well. That he had seen O. fixing the same machine and therefore he was able to fix it too.

I rather not think what happens after J.R. is gone too. There will be no gathering. I will probably have to sit by myself a lot. There will be no one to hang out with. There will be no reason to have super extra long breaks. It will be just boring boring boring boring.

Super social and active

On Saturday someone read my blog for hours, first post by post and finally digging into the archives. No one ever does that. Not even my closest friends. So it's actually really creepy. Maybe I'm having my first stalker? Omg.

EDIT: O. just send me a text message and confessed. Maybe the best timing ever? Anyway. It was indeed a nice surprise and I'm touched by the fact that he made the effort to get my number.

I have had like a super social and active weekend. On Friday I hang out with X. He came to my place to see if this was really as dirty as I said it would be. He thought I was just exaggerating, but even he had to admit that this place have seen better days. I normally clean when I know that someone is going to come over, but I was just too lazy the day before. Anyway. We also checked out my favorite playground in Perkkaa. It wasn't the same as it was like gazillion years ago but it was still pretty awesome. I'm happy that X also likes playgrounds @ nights.

On Saturday J.R. came over. I cleaned this place for him so I hope that X don't get jealous. It's just that I have known X longer and I know that he likes me enough to come over even if this place is a pig hole. I still have my doubts that J.R. would have left immediately after seeing how messy this place can really be. Anyway. I once again end up making nearly non-drinkable tea. I wonder if it's just my tea-making skills or the tea itself? If it's the tea there is still hope. And if the bad tea is not enough I also made J.R. to play "Guess Who?" with me. And I looped one VAST album for like ten hours.

And today I went to Tapiola to do some Christmas shopping. And it wasn't completely useless trip since I found something for my uncle and for my aunt. Five down, too many to go. Let's just cancel the Christmas? I also went to Sello but that was completely useless.

So it's really been social and active. And really good. I'm not much but suddenly I started to feel like a real survivor. No matter what, I always find my way. And there is always something good waiting for me if I just open the door.

What makes me a woman

I'm still amazed when I find out that someone totally random is linking to my blog. Or when someone random drops me a very nice comment. Or when someone random googles for my blog. In my point of view my blog is only full of scribbles of my own lame life... So it's a bit hard to believe that someone could actually find this fascinating.

Anyway. I guess there is a downside of hanging out with me because you can never tell if I'm going to blog about it.

Today J.R. said to me "you should know, you're a woman". It was actually a totally neutral thing to say in that situation since we were doing a crossword puzzle and the name of some Finnish fashion designer was asked. Anyway. It was the first time in my life when someone used a word "woman" in that phrase. I started to wonder when I became a woman instead of a girl.

"You're a woman now". That's how mothers comfort their daughters when they got their first periods. Though my mother ignored the whole thing and made me a bit bitter. That is like the only important thing to do and she failed it completely. So when I got my periods I was mostly ashamed. Anyway. Having periods is definitely not going to make a woman because, thanks to modern medicine, I skip them all the time. It's not like you need them. So that's not what makes me a woman.

"You're a woman now". That's how girls comfort themselves after they have lost their virginity. I don't know if this is even more inappropriate thing to mention than periods. Anyway. After five years of solid relationship there is a chance that I'm not a virgin anymore. But will that make me a woman? I doubt. Heavily.

Is it my age? I'm 21 so I have passed my teenage years. Does that make me automatically a woman? Even though I don't look old and I'm immature in so many ways? It can't be just that.

OK. Let's cut this here. In my opinion the only two things that can possibly make me a woman are these: I pay my own rent. That's an adult thing to do and I have noticed that adult females are often, well, women. And the other thing is that I have boobs. And hips "wide enough to give a birth to a small cow", as I have said earlier. And not in a way that girls have.

But I would still rather be a girl.

But not that kind

When I was little my mother taught me the code of giving and receiving. Not intentionally though but by setting an example. It was like a form of art. And if you couldn't play by the rules you simply didn't play. Anyway. The code was rooted in me in a very young age and I still play the game by the original rules: kindness is always rewarded by kindness. And the code has to be followed under any circumstances. But when I moved here about six years ago I learned that this game doesn't even exist here. There are no rules. And I still find it difficult because I can never tell if my kindness is going to waste. I'm kind but I'm not that kind. But I still play the game.

I wish I could postpone Christmas. I'm just not ready. And in a way I have started to think it as an ending. My work won't be the same after Christmas: S. quit her job today, O. will quit on Friday and eventually J.R. will quit too. They made it bearable so what happens when they are all gone and I still have to have to stay there for weeks?

I wish I could postpone Christmas. I'm just not ready. I still have to get like gazillion presents and I'm totally out of ideas. Sello is the worst shopping mall for Christmas shopping. The Body Shop is like the only place where you can actually get good presents and other shops are just waste of time.

Introducing my first-born

My blog stats are finally starting to look normal so I can start stalking again. Normal people use Blogpatrol to see how many visitors their blog has. I use Blogpatrol to see who is reading my blog. I use Google Analytics too, and though it has a lot of super cool features, it lacks the most important: "Detailed Analysis Of The Last 25 Visitors". That's how I can tell exactly when my friends have been reading my blog without asking them. It's totally stalking. I confess! But please please please let me catch you because otherwise I go insane thinking no one likes me anymore.

I decided it's time to blog something about my first ever baby. It's NW-E405 by Sony. Well... Technically Aleksi owns it but I'm the one who uses it. He barely knows how to handle it. Anyway. I'm totally heavy using my mp3-player since I use it daily when I'm going to work and when I'm coming home from work. It's like my best friend when I have to leave the house. It stores only like six albums of mp3's (512Mt) but it has always been more than I need. I usually listen to the one and the same album to the eternity. And then I maybe change. I don't get bored since I only listen to super cool music.



It's actually quite small. And the navigation rocks, though you always have to use both hands. I checked out some more modern mp3-players but none of them looked as nice. Anyway. At work I tried to tell how my player has this cycle of music. Like I load some music and listen to it until the battery runs empty. Then I load the battery and also switch one album. Or sometimes even two. And little by little it's changing. Currently I'm storing these:

Fair To Midland - Fables From A Mayfly; What I Tell You Three Times Is True
Mors Principium Est - Inhumanity
Muse - Black Holes And Revelations
Rammstein - Mutter
Rammstein - Sehnsucht
VAST - Visual Audio Sensory Theater

... but I'm mostly listening to VAST and Rammstein.

Whoa

"One day some Ubuntu noob searches for "how to make Ubuntu to start faster" and ends up here"... or someone submits it to Tuxmachines.org and to Debian-News.net and it gets like hundreds and hundreds of visitors in just one day. Guess which operating system is currently the most popular in my blog stats. Yes. It's totally overruled by Linux. My Ubuntu theme week seems to be paying off.

How to make Ubuntu to start faster

Since I'm obviously having an Ubuntu theme month...

My Ubuntu used to start really slowly, even more slowly than my former XP. It was not really a problem except on the mornings when I wanted to surf while eating my breakfast. I was finished with it when my laptop was finally ready to be used. So I thought that there has to be a way to make it faster. After a little research I learned that it was not even hard to do. I gave it a try and now this machine starts a lot faster. Whoa! Totally worth it.

I tried to find a decent tutorial in English but I couldn't find any. So I'm writing my own instead. But I'm not expecting any of my regular readers to be interested. I just believe in the power of Google. One day some Ubuntu noob searches for "how to make Ubuntu to start faster" and ends up here. And voilà, here is the how-to.

First I installed a Bootchart. It's not necessary, but it will tell you exactly how much time your computer needs to boot. If you boot your computer before any changes and after the changes, it tells you how much faster it's actually starting. So it's recommended.

To install a Bootchart: Open your terminal (Applications → Accessories → Terminal). Type sudo apt-get install bootchart and hit the enter. It will ask your password (give it) and later if you want to continue (yes).

To use a Bootchart: Boot your computer. Once it's ready to be used, go to /var/log/bootchart and open the fresh .png file. Check out the time (and other stuff if you please).

There are many ways to make Ubuntu to start faster, but this is what particularly helped me:

Once again we're using terminal. This time type sudo apt-get install sysv-rc-conf and hit the enter. Just like installing the bootchart, give it your password and later choose yes.

When it's installed, start it by typing sudo sysv-rc-conf. It will ask for your password. When it's open it will look pretty much like this:


(Click to enlarge)

Use the arrow keys to move down until you reach usplash. Remove every X from its line by hitting space. Then press q to quit.

You're not done yet.

Still in terminal, type gksudo gedit /boot/grub/menu.lst. Gedit is a text editor, and if you don't, have it, replace it with the one you do have. For example I'm using only medit, so I typed gksudo medit /boot/grub/menu.lst instead. Whatever you're using, it will still ask for your password.

Now that you have your text editor open, search for this line: # defoptions=quiet splash. When you have finally found it, remove the word splash from it. Like this: # defoptions=quiet. Save your changes and exit. Then go to your terminal and type sudo update-grub and hit the enter. It will update the menu.lst.

Now you're done. Don't forget to reboot your computer and check out the new Bootchart stats.

How I comfort myself after I fail

I wanted to add this to my previous post but then I thought that if it's once published it shouldn't be touched. So I add my note here:

I don't like to talk about my reasons for teetotalism because I have noticed that they often turn a nice little chat into a bloody debate. I don't like arguing but I'm still ready to defend my rather strong and unusual opinions. And if someone dares to question my choice I simply say goodbye.

OK. That's all.

Today I went to Verkkokauppa with Aleksi. We were supposed to go there last Saturday but they didn't have everything stored that Aleksi wanted so we didn't go. I like to go to Verkkokauppa even though I'm not really into hardware. I just like the atmosphere. Aleksi bought a new power supply and a hard disc for our PC. Now our PC is silent again (it used to make an annoying buzzing sound) and we can store even more movies.

I also ate soft ice twice. First we stopped in Hesburger to eat some, and when we were coming home from Verkkokauppa we grabbed some from McDonald's. I totally got a soft spot for soft ice and that's also the only reason to get me anywhere near junk food.

I also managed to mess with my Ubuntu. But I like to mess with my laptop because I have nothing to lose. Even if I managed to like crack the whole operating system it wouldn't matter. There are no important files to destroy and I can always reinstall everything. And sometimes my noobness gives me a good laugh. It's so great to be a girl and a nerd. No matter how little you know because it's already awesome that you're aware of it. Or at least that's how I comfort myself after I fail to do something more complex.

Lost puppy

Yesterday I went to bed around 3am and I woke up three hours later. I spent my night talking with J.J. and though we didn't really talk about anything meaningful it was worth missing a few hours of sleep. Anyway. I feel as I have known J.J. like forever but actually we met when we were sixteen so it makes only four and half years. But in a way you could say that we grew up together. There was nothing in my life that I didn't share with him. He knows everything about me and he still likes me. So I can't be so bad, right?

So it's Friday today. My least favourite of days. At work M. asked if I drink alcohol and I said I'm a teetotaller. I wasn't really comfortable even mentioning it. It's still a tabu for me. I simply don't talk about it. I'm glad he didn't asked for my reasons. That would have been too much for me. I just want to live in my little bubble where everything is pure and beautiful. M. also asked if I have done drugs but he was only joking. But he should have asked me if I smoke. Since I do, only very rarely though.

Sometimes I can't stand the idea of being alone. And I knew that when I'll get home there is no one waiting for me. So I stayed some extra time at work to help O. and to keep him some company. I know it's like really pathetic but I just didn't wanted to go home. I also took the longest way home, just to postpone the actual homecoming. But eventually I did got home. And it was dark. And lonely.

I hate when my depression is really kicking in. Most of the times I can handle it but sometimes it just takes total control over me. I took a long hot shower to reboot myself. It helped. But I wish I wasn't this cracked. I feel like a lost puppy waiting someone to take me home.

Finnish Independence Day

Today is Finnish Independence Day and therefore I had a day off. So I slept late, naturally, woke up, finally, opened my laptop, naturally, got ready, finally. And then we went to my aunt's and she made us some Mexican food. I ate as much as Aleksi and that's a lot. But Mexican food is so good and you get some like once in a decade.

By the way ever since I got my Ubuntu two of my more nerdy friends have started to talk how they want to use Linux too. And it's not a coincidence. I've been talking about it a lot. And though I don't mean to, I happen to promote it by sharing my own experiences. But I do some serious promoting too when I see it necessary and appropriate. When I started to use Adobe Illustrator I knew that J.J. would probably love it too. I'm not sure if he really uses it, but sure I tried.

This is so embarrassing. Hannes just told me that my blog has a new layout. It was not supposed to have! I did some sketching before I had to leave to my aunt's and unfortunately I saved the layout instead of closing the god damn HTML editor. I try my layouts here to see them in real action. Sometimes Lorem Ipsum is just not enough. Anyway. I hope that people have been super lazy today and have not visited my blog. I don't really want others to see my scribbles. The good thing is that I have back up's for all my templates and I had one for the real layout too. It was a bit out of date but I tried to fix it. Anyway. The problem is now solved and I hope that you who managed to see something simply forget it.

My friendship theory

I have this theory how close friendships are formed. I tried to explain it to Hannes but it was harder than I thought. So I give it a new try here:

All friendships start as a casual friendships. You meet someone, you hang out with someone and eventually you probably get to know someone quite well. We have all been there, yes. But when exactly does a friendship become more deeper one? When do you add things like trust and care into it?

And now to my thesis: You can point out the exact moment when a casual friendship gets deeper. And it's the moment when you share something special. It can be an heart to heart conversation, but more likely it's simply something more extraordinary you experience together. But the speciality of the moment has to be noticed by both. If it's not mutual, it can't be it. And that moment can't be forced and there is a big chance it never happens.

I know my theory may sound a bit weird but it makes so much sense when I look back to my own friendship history.

How to make an über best friend by Amoena

Wonder if you could like mix and match your friends characteristics and create yourself an über best friend. Wouldn't that be like totally cool? I really started to think what I would take from each of my friend to use in my new BFF. I have to say that it took a while to decide since all my current friends are awesome.

I'm only taking two characteristic from each. I don't want to be greedy. So let's begin:

From Hannes I would most definitely take his self confidence and sincerity. I think that's a good base to build a friendship. Then I would add some crazy creativity and some black sense of humour from J.J. to have fun with him. And to keep my new friend sane I would add some patience and kindness from Aleksi. Elina was a bit of an harder piece of cake, but I did figure it out: I would take her wisdom so she could make me smarter and her good spirit to keep me optimistic. From Julia I would take her conscientiousness and love for bizarre things. I value those two things. And from J.R. I would most likely steal his geekiness since out of doubt my new friend gotta be a nerd and, though this doesn't really fit the pattern, his ability to wear head-to-toe black. I want my best friend to look cool too.

I start to believe it's X-mas.

Yesterday I went to Sello with Aleksi. I was going to buy some Christmas presents though I had absolutely no idea what I was going to get. So of course I didn't get any. But I'm pretty sure that I'm going to buy everything from the Body Shop. You simply can't go wrong, pick any product and it's good enough. Anyway. I saw a lovely skirt at H&M and in a way I started to think that I could and that I should get a girly skirt. Something very short and very feminine. But then I started to think that not only I lack a short skirt, I also lack matching shoes. All my shoes are very masculine and definitely made for walking. So I would have to get new shoes too. I don't know about that. Sometimes my girly side just makes me nuts by it's cravings.

I also helped Elina with some nerdy stuff. She send me a link to some wicked HTML code and asked if I knew an easy way to get the real content out of it. And I was like "Darling, do I know an easy way". And so I did my magic and hosted the stuff for her so she was able to copy what she wanted. It was like not a big deal and it took less than 50 seconds to do, but it was nice that I was able to help someone I like with my nerdy skills. That doesn't happen often.

Today I have been playing a domestic goddess. Got you? I didn't thought so. But I surely baked plenty of ginger bread with J.R. And you can guess that the dough was not homemade. I wouldn't dare, not with my cooking skills. But the cookies turned out good and since J.R. also brought glögg it was indeed a nice kick start for Christmas.